St. Jude patient Natalie is a big sister for the first time

Natalie is a big sister for the first time, and the 4-year-old is embracing the role, cuddling baby sister, Tessie, and singing her made-up songs. She asks constantly to hold Tessie and kisses and rocks her gently. “I love you,” Natalie croons.

“She’s found her calling,” her mom, Nicole, said. She wasn’t sure how Natalie would handle a new addition to the family. Not only was Natalie the youngest of five but she also was so sick for so long that they’d doted on her even more.

Natalie was 16 months old in 2022 when she was diagnosed with neuroblastoma, a cancer that begins in developing nerve cells. She was referred to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital® for treatment. 

At St. Jude, Natalie got a second chance — and when she relapsed after a year of clear scans — a third. She’s still receiving treatment at St. Jude, though the medical port in her chest came out last summer, making her less susceptible to infection. Natalie got to take longed-for ballet lessons and, this winter, she learned to ice skate. At her checkup in January, her scans were clear, and lab work showed no evidence of cancer.

In the months since Tessie’s arrival in October, “I truly don’t think I’ve ever seen Natalie so happy, nor have I ever seen her so focused on someone else,” Nicole said. “It’s unlocked this little portal into a characteristic of Natalie’s personality we hadn’t seen before.”

After Natalie was diagnosed with cancer, the family understandably wanted to do whatever they could to make her feel better.  “Everyone was like, ‘What can I do to make this better? What can I give you? Here’s a toy. Here’s a blanket,’” Nicole said. Now Natalie offers Tessie her toys and blankets. “It’s been fun for me to see Natalie turn into a little giver,” Nicole said. 

Life lessons

Natalie is selfless when it comes to Tessie, all cooing and kindness, but not so magnanimous with her older siblings. 

After Natalie’s diagnosis, the family had spent almost a year apart — Nicole and Natalie at St. Jude in Memphis for treatment, and dad Andrew holding down the fort at home. “It was during a really formative time in Natalie’s development,” Nicole said. Natalie only saw her siblings on video calls and occasional visits. “Her concept of family was that these people showed up for a few days and then they had to say goodbye,” Nicole said. When Natalie relapsed, Nicole requested a treatment plan that allowed more family time. Nicole and Natalie spent only part of each month at St. Jude, with her two oldest, Luke and Josie, taking turns accompanying them.

Natalie had grown used to someone always at her beck and call, keeping her safe and guaranteed guests for tea parties who readily handed over their toys. Now, with longer stretches between checkups at St. Jude and medicines Natalie can take at home, the family’s life has returned to its familiar routines. Homeschooling. Soccer practices. Meals around the big table, all of them together.  

“Now that Natalie is feeling better, she’s been thrown back into the fold,” Nicole said. She’s hearing, “no,” from her siblings for the first time and told to wait her turn. “She doesn’t really know what to do with that,” Nicole said, laughing.

They are important lessons, ones her parents reinforce, but Natalie’s best teachers are her siblings. When the kids build with magnetic tiles, Josie, who’s 11, reminds Natalie, “You can have this portion, but you can’t take all of them.” 

“Mom always says, ‘You have little eyes watching you,’ so I’ve got to be the role model,” Josie said. She knows learning to share will make Natalie an even better big sister.

‘Family is forever’

One of the reasons Nicole and Andrew wanted to homeschool was so their kids would be friends. Their kids communicate well, respect and listen to each other’s points of view and work together to solve problems. 

Nicole hopes that will carry over into their adult lives, and they’ll look forward to coming home for holidays and will turn to each other for advice and support. “I hope they grow together as they get older, and they want to go through the good times — and the hard times — with one another,” she said.

The kids — Luke, the oldest at 13; Josie; Cate, who’s 9; Benjamin, 7; and Natalie — help each other, and all dote on Tessie. “It’s always nice to know that Luke’s ready to help me with my math or Benjamin’s ready to give me a hug when I’m not feeling great,” Josie said. Luke tells his siblings to be kind to each other. “You have each other for life,” he said. “Family is forever.”

It’s a lesson Natalie has learned, and as she coos and sings to her new baby sister, readily handing over her toys and blankets, Natalie is teaching Tessie, too, as big sisters do.